two questions that help me deal with anxious feelings | random thought
I’m back at it again. In front of my desk. This time there is no getting around. I have to deal with this problem now. But I don’t want to.
It started early in the morning. I had a small anxious feeling. I knew today I have to deal with this one particular problem in my project. And with the time and morning passing by, the anxious feeling grew bigger and bigger.
Why do I always get this anxious?
And how can I deal with it?
It seems like I get this anxious feeling when I have to deal with new problems or face unknown obstacles. Either at work with new tasks, that I don’t have any experience with, or during my learning side projects when I hit an obstacle, don’t understand a concept, and don’t know how to move forward.
It becomes difficult to move past this feeling, sit down, and try my best to work on the obstacle.
the memory
While floating in my anxious feeling, I recalled that I also had this feeling during university. But how did I overcome it back then? How did I stay up, get on my desk, and start learning despite the anxious feeling that seems to stop me now?
I made learning enjoyable.
I didn’t like preparing flashcards. I didn’t like using digital notes.
I liked researching and taking a lot of notes of what might be relevant — I called them abstract notes. I always had a pile of notes and paper lying everywhere in my room.
I liked distilling my abstract notes — rephrasing and connecting them as final notes, which I would use for my learning. Abstract notes are random notes of what might be interesting. These distilled notes were the notes I would learn with. The reason why I enjoyed this process was that, instead of writing my distilled notes on flashcards, I would use drawing pads — these huge paper pieces — to write down my final notes. I could make connections easier between topics on this huge piece of paper and see the bigger picture.
If you want to learn something, make it enjoyable for yourself. Even if it is unconventional. Even if it doesn’t make sense to anybody else.
two questions
Remembering this, I formulated two questions to deal with my small rushes of anxiety.
- How can I play with this?
- How can I learn from this?
The first one refers to making the obstacle that you are facing enjoyable. It helps me get into a mindset where I don’t take things and myself so seriously. I try to solve the problem by playing with it.
The second point shifts my mindset to see the obstacle as a learning opportunity. I can try my best. It is ok if I do it poorly at first. I can always iterate and try doing better. The important thing is to embrace the obstacle and not to run away.
The last few times these questions helped me a lot to deal with small rushes of anxiety. How do you deal with anxious feelings?
